I Got $5 On It: Badass Abraham Lincoln

It’s been a while since I’ve featured an Abraham Lincoln T-Shirt. What’s the hell is wrong with me. It’s okay, this is fixed with THIS T-shirt designed by Tim Shumate and available now from Threadless. Say hello to thug Abraham Lincoln, complete with tattoos, ear stretchers, and wife beater. Mary Todd Lincoln would be so proud.

By the way, you all should be ready for the barrage of Abe Lincoln tees over the next few months. Why? New movie coming soon, it’s called Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. If you haven’t read it yet then you’re missing out.

I Got $5 On It is available now from Threadless for $20.

Abe Lincoln and the Intergalactic Civil War

In an alternate universe, Abraham Lincoln would not have been assassinated by John Wilkes Booth while watching Our American Cousin on April 14, 1865 at Ford’s Theater. Then again, if we lived in an alternate universe then maybe Abraham Lincoln could have shot back at Booth with laserbeams coming out of his eye balls while a bear-ish Teddy Roosevelt stomped repeatedly on Booth, making sure that his fur got into the deep crevices of his body.

Lincoln is available now from Jon Wye for $29.

Abe’s Civil War After Party

We’ve seen a lot of Abraham Lincoln themed T-Shirt over the last fews years. I guess it’s his quirky awkwardness that makes him such an appealing T-Shirt subject. Needless to say, there have been some hits and some misses. Abe’s Civil War After Party by Cake & Rockets and is definite hit. It’s not just a hit, it’s freakin’ awesome! It’s reminiscent of the iconic Threadless tee, The Communist Party by Tom Burns. But I’ll go one better and say that it’s even better than that Burn’s classic. How so? I mean come one, we’ve got peeps from the good ol’ US of A. And at the center of the madness is arguably one of the greatest presidents ever, Abraham Lincoln. And did you know that he was also a Vampire Hunter? Hell yeah. I love him even more now knowing that he indulges in beer pong during his down time.

Abe’s Civil War Party by Santiago Sanchez is available now from Cake & Rockets for $19.99.