TypeTees Slogan-A-Day Experiment Week 5

Every day I come up with a new witty Threadless TypeTees Slogan in hopes of earning a Threadless Alumni Club Medal of Honor. At the end of every week I post a round up of that weeks slogans here on my blog. What can you do to help the cause? Vote! Just click on a slogan (preferably all of them) and then vote by click “I’d Wear It!” – it’s that simple! If you want to see and vote for all of my slogans then just click here or on that photo of me with the Rockband guitar. Vote for me and I will bake you your own burrito if ever we meet in real life.

TypeTees Slogan-A-Day Experiment

Week 5 (January 29, 2010 to February 4, 2010):

The only chemistry I know is synthesized by Cupid’s arrow.

I was listening to someone talk about biochemistry and this slogan popped up in my head! Would make a good Valentines Day TypeTee, Threadless staff **Wink, Wink**!

CAPS LOCK: for moments when an exclamation point is not enough!

Especially for those who like to write things like FTW! or WIN! – you know these people and you might even be one. Slogans FTW!

65 is the original 140.

OK, you need to be both a web geek and a Threadless geek to get this one. Before Twitter made 140 characters an iconic cultural limitation, OMG Clothing (later to become TypeTees) made 65 characters the max you had to get your thought across. In my opinion, 65 is so much harder to do than 140.

Geeks don’t skip. They tab.

Skipping? Pfffftttt. Real geeks tab.

Moderation is key. Now can I have more advice?

People inherently want more, and more, and more. But the key, no matter what, is always moderation. Want more advice? Knew you would.

Being green is as easy as finding a yellow and blue marker.

Step 1. Find yellow and green marker. Step 2. Color yourself with said markers until your entirely green. And there you go – BAM – GREEN! Now go worry about your carbon footprint.

Optical zoom should be a default feature of the human eye.

Really, it should! If cameras can do it then why not the eyeball! Imagine if you could zoom in and out using your MIND. That would be insane. I want that!

TypeTees Slogan-A-Day Experiment Week 3

Another week and another set of slogans for my epic TypeTees Slogan-A-Day Experiment. I am starting to feel some fatigue but I will not let it get to me. I will push on until Threadless Gods deems me worthy of a print – boing! To see all of my slogans and to vote for them check out my Threadless profile page. Vote for me and I will make bake you a cake if ever we meet in real life.


I can read your mind. Yes.

No real story behind this one, I think I had something I previously planned to submit but then at the last minute I thought of this one. Yes, that’s right.

I make great animal sounds. Pinch me for a live demo.

Indeed I do make great animal sounds. Ask anyone in my family. I make very very very good animal sounds. I specialize mainly in house pets but can do some darn good farm animals.

The best part of a ham sandwich is the hypotenuse.

This I got after I saw someone on Twitter (sorry I can’t remember who) say that their girlfriend said the most genius thing, that she loved the hypotenuse of her sandwich. I thought that was brilliant.

I spike my hair for self defense.

I’ve gone back to the spiky hair after a long year and half sporting the long hair look. And I love having short hair again, especially since I can easily poke people I don’t like with the razor sharp spiky hair.

When I grow up I want to be a swashbuckler.

No, I wasn’t watching Pirates of the Caribbean at the time this slogan was conceived. I believe I was reading an article on Yahoo and the word swashbuckler came up. Thought it sounded great. And for the record, I don’t reaaaaallly want to be a swashbuckler when I grow up. 

I really really really really really like ice cream, a lot.

Oh, this one was inspired by a professor of mine while were discussing the infinite properties of language. And one point during the talk he had said that same thing (probably with more r’s) and then explained how he could have been the very first person to have said that, ever. And for the record, I like mint chocolate chip ice cream and cherry Garcia the most and maybe pralines and cream. 

I use headphones to block out the noises in my head.

No, I’m not schizo. I just realizes that I need a new pair of Bose headphones because mine are becoming very worn out and is leaving awkward black scum on my ear lobes. At least that’s what the noises inside my head told me.